He and that's a fantasy.

Closing the doors, there stands he.
Across the bridge, his hand out.
Wants me to entangle, every bit of mine.
Calling me, there, in his world.

This side is me, complete me.
knotted myself to a house.
Here stand people, I grew up with
and doors, I lived in.

Skipping a heartbeat, looking at him
reality is playing fantasies.
"Come!", he says, calling me...

"Here", I said, crying.

A step backwards, he took right there.
The pain flushed through my every vein of the face

Breathing heavily, he looked at me.
shattering myself, I went ahead.

Stopping myself, were the knots tied
I  had to believe, I lived there.
"He's a fantasy, let him go!", my mind said
"This is love.", said the heart.

Pain is the bridge, the bridge, in the middle
Love is there, at his side
Smile is where, where he stands
But knots are tied, in here, this side.

Time is flying, he has to go

Winds covering, I allow him to go
Dark grey clouds, blanketing me

Love is he and that's a fantasy.

He turned, he left.
I closed the door, curtaining the room
Distance tearing loudly here
Crying out tears, shattering me

Responsibility held a win this time,
Dreams play him all the time
knowing the fact, I have to live

memories play all night.

Love is there, it's just him

Close the door, the wild is wind

Walks away, that's he
He is love and that's a fantasy.

Similarities found.

Six months now since I'm back. Never thought, returning back to my own town is going to be so difficult. It still feels new. The ice is still taking time to freeze.

Life is going to take a little more time to fix itself with this change. I'm still an alien for this city. Well, the good part is, I'm not the only one who feels like this. Everyday, a new conversation takes place. Every day, a new conversation reminds me of how everything that was old is suddenly new and how everything that was new is now old.

When a lazy Sunday hits your mental status, all you want to do is, stick your ass at one place and brag about things. Then, the person in front of you doesn't matter. New or old, everything on a clumsy day means ' I'm your temporary best friend. Hear me out! '. What comes to you as a surprise is that the person listening to you also goes through the same stuff almost everyday.

Going too main stream with this feeling too.

13 similar things all who've migrated for studies outside Surat and have come back have faced.

1. " You're a girl and you have a phone number of a bootlegger. "

- When this happens, I feel like stabbing that person. " Oh yes! you sexist creature. I also carry alcohol for my dad when I return back from another state. I'm also a bootlegger in your words. "

I don't understand that concept of acting so judgemental when it comes to women. You're the bitch who craved for alcohol too. Am I supposed to judge you here too?

2. Your parents will freak out at least once a week if they see you at home for more than 3 hours in the evening.

- Leaving your hometown for a couple of years is the best thing that can ever happen to a human being. You actually realize what it is to be on your own bed and in your own room.

I can't explain this to my parents. They find me crazy.

3. Coffee, books, music, laptops, etc. Such ' not so human ' things become your best friends.

- I was too alone to deal with snobbish crowd. Yes, the above mentioned things are my best friends. They hold no tantrums.

Expecting from human beings around you doesn't become a priority. Updating your collection does!

4. " My vocab is getting WORSE. I don't have people to communicate in English with me. ", " This city is affecting me in a worse way. I judged my mother today. She was applying a nail paint. "

- Mumbai for me was a 'I don't care a fuck! ' city. People don't have the time to see their neighbours or even greet them with a smile. Everybody is running. I always did. Class, submissions, trains and bus. I ran once on the main road. Guess what? Nobody cared to even look. Even I did not!

Only when I saw a good looking guy, I hopelessly turned once. Small towns make you clumsy. You don't have a lot to do. Hence, ' staying free' here means ' taking interest in their lives '. Also, having people who are definitely not good with their English make you live a dark life. So, freaking out is absolutely normal.

5. You'll eventually get tired of looking at the same faces.

- Frustration is a fever and it's very harmful. Trust me! In a small town, you get to see the same faces. Everybody knows everybody. Nothing is new about them! Even your parents. You'll eventually get frustrated and tired of them.

I've become brutally honest with all this. And I freaked my mother out when I told her that I was bored of meeting her everyday. #FreeAdvice don't get brutal. But, please be honest! They might just stop disturbing you.

6. Your favorite spot will be near the river.

- People find me lonely when I go and sit alone. But then my tiny short tempered brain will make me realize that for them, this is a place to make out. It's kinda romantic for them to gross people out.

The best escape from all the jang bang is to sit near the water. Some blah theory in the past proved gave solution. Now, I believe in it.

7. People will give you the awkward look if they see you wearing shorts.

- I really have changed my wardrobe from shorts to jeans. People are annoying here! They've failed to notice their legs.

I really find this city safer because people save the male gaze activity by wearing jeans and stupid due to their lack of knowledge in fashion. Not like, I'm some fashion queen. But being a little sensible is not their thing. But being judgemental is their favourite thing.

8. You'll definitely ask for an advice from a person who has lived in the same town for the entire graduation.

- You have the entire city to yourself but everything is at a smaller scale. You'll get bored and run out of activities.

Crossword in this city is Bliss. But, company around you will never walk into that store. Unfortunate us!

9. The people who experience all this will become your buddies.

- ' Yo bro! ' #EnoughSaid

10. Emotional breakdown and having really just no one to share your thoughts with, will become a normal thing.

- I sometimes randomly cry while getting dressed or before doing to bed or after waking up in the morning. Thoughts clutter! They pinch you. Your decision of coming back, telling your closed ones about you getting tired of meeting them, feeling frustrated and breaking something become thoughts that eat you. You'll feel incomplete which will really make no difference once you cry it out alone.

Living alone changes you. People who've missed seeing you like this will never understand. Not even your best friend.

11. Avoiding your best friend will really be no big deal.

- Distance makes you realize, how important a person is in your life. When you return back, your best friend is the happiest person. But then, meeting him/ her becomes a responsibility then a duty and later an irritation.

Remember! If you're best friend is mad at you because of this distance you've created or she/ he has created with you, it's for the good. Don't judge / bitch / blame them. They're the people you've loved the most. It's better to be a little away than to make it ugly! After all, F.R.I.E.N.D.S. is just a SITCOM.

12. You'll randomly open up about a few things to new people who've been somewhat like you.

- Meeting and sharing with a new person is a harmless activity. But once they start expecting, you need to have a full stop.

13. In the end, you'll become absolutely normal about drugs, smoke, alcohol, bisexuality, etc. And your parents will say this. " you need a psychiatrist "

- Well, having a psychiatrist doesn't mean, you're crazy! A psychiatrist is a person who becomes a sponge.
Absorbs your shit and advices you. Really, abroad, EVERYONE has a counsellor. People in India, especially Surat make a big deal out of it, I sometimes wonder why!

You're definitely not crazy if you're okay with these terms. You've just widened your knowledge.





Being like this doesn't have to worry you. It has to worry the culture, the city has been continuing. Not everyone can change it. So breathe and dance. Because, you're not the only one here!

There's no Full Stop!

From all the things I've ever done, I've realized one thing, I would never have an end for anything. Relationship, friendship, love for food, reading, LEARNING, be it anything. 

It's my fourth month since I left Mumbai and my heart still doesn't want to believe it. Thoughts just take the joy away. I want to punch my heart and tell it, that it wasn't DEATH. Stop making me overreact. The incompleteness shall never go. But not everything has to be done. I mean, I'm just 21 , okay turning 22. But I've like a zillion things to do. God doesn't want me to die young! Hehe! 

With everything running here and there in my brain, I've come to a conclusion : 

There's no full stop! None of us have it until death or wait...actually even after that! Let me prove it to you! 

1. Past never leaves, it's a ghost, it will haunt you! 

2. At this age, no matter how worse things get between friends, they'll not cut ties, REALLY! You get immune to the fights, BELIEVE ME! even the WORST fights. 

3. Like love grows, if you're a FOODIE, no matter what you do and how much ever you want to convince yourself, you'll never give up on it. And if you do, you'll never stop missing it! 

4. CHANGE IS INEVITABLE. Period. 

5. Reading shall never die. NEVER! 

6. And, Mommy/ Daddy/uncle/aunt, etc once said, " You learn everyday! " so this is never going, definitely! 

It's high time, I know. Things you plan are always going to be different. But they will happen, of course, just in a different manner. Things take time, everything's slow. It has to be slow because everything that's supposed to happen will prove it why is it happening. And in the end, when they happen, the feeling for it will completely change. 

Sometimes, I wonder, why do I even want to blog about all these things. Then, I again think, why am I even making a deal out of it. I mean, IT'S OKAY to have no matter,  real matter added to it. Nothing specific! You can express a few things meaninglessly! I've grown out of my thoughts, but silence ends up finding me. But wasting time over a wait for it to stop is useless. Confusion has to play it's role. You will still not understand, where you want to stand. You will absolutely break down one night and cry , wondering what is really bothering you. You will feel lost! But, with everything, you need to accept what is there with you. 

I no more miss the meet with the sea, because my room gives me a company. I've convinced myself that the part classrooms played is now played by the cubical alloted to me. Books have changed to a computer, friends are now colleagues and traveling to a longer distance is no more there. The sound of the traffic from my Mumbai house is now gone because a society in this town is quiet and simple. Long walks at Malabar are now about working out in a gym. There's something about the metro city citizens:
1. They never care. With that, they'll never care what's happening with you and they'll also never care to be present when you really need some help!
2. They've never bothered. That was your comfort zone. 

But here, your friends & family and even the person who you love will bother about your silence. 

Home was, is and will always be good. I've missed calling a house, home. Missed calling people, a family, missed having friends! But with this piercing silence, I've also learnt to be alone.Being with self is the best It makes you grow, grow mature!

With that, I'm still dealing with the worse, the city did to me. People I lived with it, made me their liability. Family issues! College was worse than school. Working & studying was tougher than a morning workout and yet I miss everything! Everything that made me independent.

And here, when said " A small town is relaxing" well , I have to deny it!You always have people who buzz around you and work to focus on.Parents to care, Friends to love, work to focus on! But no time to even think about yourself!

With all  the 'this and that, here and there', one thing is never going to stop, The feeling of being LOST! The feeling of falling in love with the worse. Eventually, you'll realize, the worse of all is the only thing you love. When you see the worse in the city/person/ situation, you know, you're really in love! 

And then...

how hard you try to stop loving it,

there's no full stop! 

Playing the Part.

They say, " Life is full of surprises. Because, it's not what you make it, you are what it makes you. " 

SURPRISES. Of course, side effects come hand in hand. 

Leaving a metro city wasn't easy. Really, it's never been easy! When you start living in a metro city, no matter how much you crib about life getting tougher,  you realize that it's the city you want to be in. People, culture, lifestyle and what not, it changes you. " My world has shattered " , " my life's over " , " everything around me is falling apart ".... BLAH BLAH BLAH. This traumatic situation is a part of human behavior. Of course, I faced it too. Holding my hair and crying in front of the mirror was my favorite activity. Emotional breakdown had become the major part of my routine. And obviously,  " You're disturbed " was something I fancied. Now, I just roll my eyes when I think of all the melodrama. We grow up everyday and realizing it during the process is when 'surprises' play their role.

Holding to something, you've been really attached to is not wrong. But giving a chance to a twist in your life is one adventure. People in my life have brought the change in me. Every person I meet is a sign of change. They teach you, they change you. 

This one person, I will not name, is a surprise too. 

He surprises me not with chocolates of bouquets. 

He surprises me with his simplicity. Not like, I'm a very fancy person, but his love for simple things makes me love them too. 

He surprises me with his knowledge. Knowledge is power and for him, examination is a judgement. He might not be a scholar but he loves to learn 

and 

for me, to learn is the new change. 

He surprises me with his talent. His creativity is his talent and that talent is what I adore. 

For me, 

getting back to my creativity, is the change!

His calmness surprises me. 

.

 He's calm and quiet, he likes to be peaceful. 

Now, 

" BREATHE !" is my new mantra! "  

His patience is his strength. 

Seriously, God! Your creation is divine. I can never be as patient as him. 

His humor is a surprise. Smart answers can leave people speechless. 

His confidence can never be overrated. It's a bulls eye! Hits the right spot every time.

For me, 

believing in myself, is the new change.

He surprises me of the fact that his presence is an addiction. His absence can make someone crazy!
For me, 

knowing that addiction can also be good, is the new change.  

His smile is priceless.
For me,
Smile to whatever comes to you, is the new change. 

He's alive, he's around. He's always there, playing his part...

When I say, life is a surprise and you are what it makes you, I just mean... This surprise is the new change and no matter what I say, I love this change a little more than anything I can ever love in this life.

10 Tips for a newbie in Mumbai

It's not easy, really not easy to shift from a small town to a metro city.
What makes it more difficult? To shift back from that same metro city to the same old small town.

They say, Once you live in Mumbai, your adjustments open all the gates.

5 Things about the city you can never let go.

1. Sound of the traffic.
2. The Arabian Sea.
3. Spending money recklessly.
4. Culture.
5. Heat.

As a student, I had big dreams obviously! Getting through Sophia College was like a dream come true.
I've survived my entire life between  the catholic religion and also GIRLS. More than a temple, I preferred praying in a church, more than " Jai Shree Krishna " it was always " In the name of the Father & of the Son and the Holy Spirit. ". I've known the bible better than Bhagwad Gita and I've preferred to stay comfortable around females than men. My school was a convent, my college was a convent. I've never had teachers or sirs as my mentors, never followed the words like "dean". It was always "Father" or " Sister" . Never walked into a temple during my Diwali holidays but have definitely taken a candle to the grotto. Being a Hindu, I never cursed anybody for putting in  between females or never complained of not knowing my own religion so well and never letting me realize what coed education meant. The plus point was, I was comfortably breathing with no male gaze around me. I was always blessed to have well-spoken teachers all my life. Be it high school or college. So definitely, a girls college was never an issue.

Sooner or later, this day had to come. You always face the real mixed emotion scenario when you're leaving your city after high school. Memories of school, friends, family, your room , the desk, your cupboard, your feelings, etc.  And you always go through the same feeling when you're again switching back from that new city to the old one. But...in those years, you realize, your return can be to the same place but things change. You change! Friends change. Feelings change. Everything changes.

I went through something similar. I had the same numbness when I stepped inside the train leaving my dad alone.A friend had come too. I considered her my "best friend"( she no longer talks to me. Tee-Hee) . When I reached Mumbai, I could feel the different air . And that was the time, when I realized, this definitely is going to be "Kick-ass".

When people say,  Mumbai takes enough and gives enough. Whatever happens in that process is what you give. It's like Karma! It's true.

Mumbai- " The Paris of India." , " Bollywood's birth place. ", " India's New York! ". These were the phrases I was introduced to, initially. The excitement you hold while entering it, trust me, is just half to the tears you shed when you're stuck with the snobbish townies. And then... When loneliness will come and eat you, the sea  and the sound of the waves will get you at peace. Where, your walk in any restaurant will cost you a bomb, there itself the summer job internship pay will fill your pocket. Where the noisy clubs would get you high on alcohol, there itself can be the most peaceful walk at Marine Drive. Where Fashion and richness sparkle like crystal , there simplicity and cheap transport favors you. Everything about that city is at the extreme! Either you're high or absolutely sober. Either you're rich or absolutely poor. Either you're alone everyday gathering bits of lonely moments or having the best time of your life with your friends. Either you're absolutely busy with work or you're completely jobless.

Time passed, my expectation grew. As a student what do you dream of?  Frankly?

- A stay at a PG or a hostel. ( Because i want to experience a life like F.R.I.E.N.S.)
- " I want to work because I want to be independent. "
- Beer is ll over the city, would be chilling there almost everyday.
- ANDDDD there's ZAAARAAAA!

Listen!

PG owners screw your case to death specially if you're a girl. I was stuck with a family and locked in a room for months because I was restricted from the exposure of a metro city. So, DEPRESSION DAYS mode  Got activated.

Work? Get yourself a fucking degree. Mumbai definitely throws a lot of money but only if you own a stamp paper. Talent is not your only support.

BEEERRRRRR.... costs you half of what you can afford everyday! Mumbai= Money . You need to be expensive to afford a 150/- mug everyday.

#FreeAdvice If you're a small townie and you can't have proper clothes on, NEVER enter Zara. RICH FEMALE gaze is worse than facing MALE gaze. They want to cut you in pieces if you're hair is not set properly or you are not dressed well.


So, 10 tips when you shift to a city like Mumbai.

1. Feel blessed to have a family house. 
But curse yourself to get locked too! If you have relatives who keep you locked, make sure you yell and throw things only because you want them to realize, you' re not here because you wanted to get locked. You're here to breathe and you will be disciplined. ( don't leave beer for that! :P ) I regret not standing up for myself.

2. Please ATTEND COLLEGE.
Mumbai localites are snobbish and un friendly. But every college offers a campus recruitment. Your career lives there, grows there. Polish yourself for the worse . Going to college will fill your pocket with extra money.
Plus points are:
1. Mumbai internships PAY!
2. Your experience in any field will teach you so much when you're just a teenager.

3. Go to cheap places like Janta in Bandra! 
Be blessed if your account balance has 25k a month and you like to walk in with Aldo shoes and a Zara shirt with Vera Moda pants. But, if you don't own all this, places like Gokuls & Janta or Sodas are the saviors. Cheap beer , where whatever and walk in. It might look shady, but the student crowd is HOT and beer is really cheap!

4. Use PUBLIC TRANSPORT. 
Buses & Trains are your best travel buddies. The areas they go to are tagged with bus nos. They are safe till 11 P.M. for ladies and trains save A LOT OF TIME. Again, the crowd can be risky for your wallets and phones but a little bit of care and you're absolutely living the real Mumbai. Yes, walk to the nearest places. PLEASE!  A 2 km is not so tiring, it saves your money and also makes you lose wight! You cut almost 70% of your expenditure, also saves your energy and time over traveling if you learn to make the proper use of it.

5. Carry a city map.
Areas like church-gate are mirrored. Everything looks like everything. Same! I know, it's the world of GPS but, save the phone battery and use the map, you by heart the names of the lanes. Learn to know where and how tiny lanes have short cuts and also, know the city you're living in. It's an inspiration to know your hometown later when you return.

6. SAVE MONEY! 
Mumbai can cruelly kill your bank balance. Start saving! You never know, you might just get to drink in rich clothes at a five star or even shop the in the international branded shops or have a ' swim in alcohol ' birthday party. But learn to save! Save as much as you can because once you know how to calculate your money , you learn responsibility.

7. GO for FESTS and PLAYS! 
Why spend 300 bucks over a movie? Watch a play at Prithvi Theatre! They are cheap and beautiful. Better than any unsuccessful Bollywood movie. Go for the bandra fest or the worli fest and DO NOT  miss the KAla Ghoda fest. The art experimented would have kept Aristotle also doubt free . ( okay that was exaggerated). But when you go for plays, there are things you learn. Fests are an escapism from your daily day to day trouble. Learn what the city experiments with!

8. VISIT the landmarks. 
If confused, climb the " Mumbai tour " bus. It will show you what makes an Island so different. The beauty of Marine drive wears a queen's necklace.  The a drive over the sea with the sea link. The elegance of the British Architecture at Colaba, The holy mosque in the middle of the sea Haji Ali, the blessed Sidhivinayak, The entrance of Gateway of India, The Mumbai High Court, the oldest metro Cinemas and a lot more.
Mumbai is an island of hidden treasure, treasure of beauty. Know it!

9. One clubbing night. 
People might call it noisy. But there are Saturday nights  when you just want to dance and get high. one clubbing night a month is worth an experience. But also carry rubber. Men are too hot to handle and one night stand is a life time experience.

10. SIT by the sea
If you're not fond of meditation, it's really okay. Magic is something the sea has! Ever lived near the sea? The breeze holds a healing power. The sound of the waves is better than a band music, the sunset and the sunrise are prettier than a perfect face of a woman.


When people ask me what true love really means,  I would tell them, it was the city I fell in love with.  It turns me speechless.  My words go less and there's a piercing silence within me everytime I think of not being there again. It's HARD,  hard to know that a small townie can change so much after living in that city because of the city.

So,  if you're a newbie in Mumbai, make the most out of it.

She's definitely me, BUT not me.

Here's a fact. I'm in a relationship, with HER. Let's call her S. We both have been brought up together and mommy said, " the person who can read your thoughts is the person who will stay in love with you forever."
I'm here, being one good child.

Racing through the new generation thoughts, Really UNFORTUNATELY, I'm straight. And she is too!

The point is, I'm in a relationship with HER, a friendship shared with her. She's been with me since childhood but has always been far away even when we have physically appeared a lot of times in front of each other.

Say whatever, ups and downs, high school gossips, migrating for graduation and all that...
But, this little tom boyish side of me has a secret girl hiding inside deep somewhere. Like every girl, I too have a girlfriend. Who, I technically call the BEST friend. Hang on, there's no BFF nuisance hanging here. She's the BEST | friend. See the broken term? I've never had slumber nights wearing pink pajamas or nighties with her. I definitely haven't shared a "Pink Pages" novel with her. I've never had high school gossips in high school with her and obviously never exchanged expensive pink or red wrapped gifts with her. I've grown up with her. She's been my classmate since my kinder garden days. But with the whole school hierarchy with group systems have kept me separately. I met her as a FRIEND after completing 19 years of life and 14 years of school life. You see, two people are destined to be together but they turn blind even when they are alone in one class.

Moving forward, she's the person, I share a long distance friendship with. She's an introvert, but opens herself like a jewel box in front of  me. She's from a very conservative background religiously, but the MOST non- judgmental lass a girl could ever have. She believes cellphones are waste of time and create cruel addiction for a human being but also tries and hunts for that destructive gadget when she wants to speak to me. For her, routine has to be busy, but also cribs about having no free time during her busy hours.

While on the other hand, there's me. I'm a complete extrovert who blabbers her life tragedies openly with sense of humor dipped in like chocolate in vanilla. ( I'm an ice cream lover ) . I  gel up with people like sugar mixed in milk. It doesn't take time. I belong to a "SHOW-OFF our dumbness" background ( Punjabis ) and obviously don't bother to care about what the hell is happening outside. ( something similar to her when judging takes place) I drink alcohol like water, can't breathe if my phone's not around, annoyingly spoilt, ridiculously negative and stupidity runs through my blood veins. I'm clumsy and I eat everything that is edible. I waste time only because I want to sleep and I cry over lame break ups.

The relationship I'v been in with S is the most precious, comfortable and the most flexible relationship a brain can expect. I share almost 99% of my life with her. That one percent hides the amount of love I hold for her. We both meet at rare occasions. None of us complain about the lack of communication, we both wet our pillows with wasted salt water on it over boy drama alone and then laugh over the same thing when we meet. We don't have so many pictures posted on public websites or even in our phones or our laptops. While, I get busy over spending my entire money over Flipkart book sales, she'll save the same amount and then spend it on our rare lunches. cuz I'm always broke. While, I plan to sit and cry over relationship nuisance, she'll flip the pages of magazines and then make me laugh my ass out by saying, " useless material input failure" . She'll hug me when I'll tell her about my broken family talks and then also ask me not to press her sexy boobies with my huge forehead.

I talk to her about my wallet getting ragged by me, bill amounts going high, drinking and passing out like a waste piece of shit , how to raise children, what to shop, education, sex, future, etc. ( who needs a boyfriend now?)

But there's always something special about her. There has always been a moment where silence drops in from my side and she will know exactly what is curtained right behind that. She might not know my favorite color, but the color she chooses will make me look impeccable. Also, She'll drop in by my side always when I become an isolated moron. And, she'll always hug me and accept me for all the moments where I've looked like a douche. What makes all of this special is, she's not given me years of friendship but she's definitely given me memories of 1000 years. In return, She's never asked for the BFF tag or any of the  girly statements normal girls make. But, she knows what exactly I've been through and I'm going to do. never asked me to skype, never got mad at me Never asked me when I might return to my hometown, never asked me what and why  I did and what made me do it. Then, be it a date with a guy or a stupid fight with my mother, she's always known every bit of me. every inch of me!

Hence, I conclude, She's definitely me, BUT not me. She's my person.

10 highlights of 2013.

When people say, " You've changed, A LOT! You've moved on. ", there are two things that can practically affect you.
1. You give that statement a big smile and wink at the person.
                                   OR
2. You feel a sudden rush of guilt for changing yourself drastically.

Option No. 1 made me feel ME!
When I say, Move on, I DO NOT mean,  I've moved on because I have --" the love of my life left me " drama.

The year 2013 was a year of Happiness. A year of Speed. A year of KNOWLEDGE. And a year which made me realize, that yes, from all the things I can ever come across, my love for FOOD is UNDYING.

1. When the year started, I was busy preparing myself for my MATH/ Statistics paper and luckily, I got through it because it happened to screw me royally in the past.

2. I got through my final year of English Literature. I considered myself to be normal enough to understand what literature meant in the books. The final year was the door to a complete separate world where everything felt normal, yet abnormal.

3. I've never been rude/ harsh to anybody who argues with me. Well, I realize, I'm definitely not a Robot. I think, even a Robot has to be recharged. ( not sure of my scientific knowledge being right ) . Well, I realized, I need to learn to  SPEAK UP! Because, if the ozone layer can get tired of soaking the pollution, then my heart & my brain definitely can have a saturation point. So yelling at a person or breaking things & getting angry is RIGHT.

4. Unexpected out of a foodie like me, the best way to escape from the daily chaos is to GYM. The frustration sweats out and you also know that burning some amount of calories can make you look sexy. ( to all my readers who are my close friends, Feb I start with it again)

5. IT'S OKAY to breathe in peace when you are enjoying your last months with amazing food and alcohol joints, spending a little bit of time in Crossword because " the no network " moment with books around you is just so blissful. "cuz arguing & justifying is not meant to be focused on.

6. I might have been blamed of having " wrong " friends around me. But hello, my friends who sink themselves with alcohol on a weekend, practice sex as a healthy exercise and also smoke weed to numb the boredom are the most classy people. She's a girl, who's vocab a man can never beat. She's a smart girl with excellent movie sense, HIGHLY educated and also a girl who devotes herself because she wants the best body. He is a brother who happens to be intelligent enough with his taste in clothes , music and food. The best with event management and also my favorite photographer. And two other friends which have an unbeatable sense of humor and when high, they can make you laugh your tears out. all of them are excellently PRACTICAL and non- judgmental. They can handle the wrong & the right me all the time.

7. I've been lucky enough to surround myself with people who teach me that  knowledge is the power, Gym is the motivation, Love is my originality , Ignorance is to avoid the daily nuisance and FOOD, my best friend is happiness.

8. You are not lucky enough if you have a simple- educated- well spoken boyfriend. You're ABSOLUTELY & COMPLETELY LUCKY * pink blushes* when you have your OWN room with yellow bricked walls , a BIG mirror, a HUGE KING-SIZED BED and shelves with novels decorated. A room, i call it MINE after 21 years.

Now, I can spend my own sweet time doing everything possible there 'cuz the room is secretly located in a  bungalow with three floors and help myself get rid off the daily soap opera nonsense, family drama and also the stupid neighbor-coming-going routine.

9. With the whole move on thing, I consider, Sometimes it's okay to make trips. Trips which become a break. Trips that make your weekend go good. Trips which really happen 'cuz you want to say goodbye to a person makes you open to the statement , " A Goodbye can never be good". In my 4 years of Graduation, I've made 12 trips in 2013. 12! yes, that's a LOT for a year. But, this little sensitive side of me wanted to make the best out of the final year. Sp. An overnight trek risking your life, ( a little exaggeration is okay! ) with rain and height- phobia ( Vertigo) *with psychology sophistication highlighted*  .. And a trip to Bangalore is undeniably unforgettable.

10. A fixed job! No, I'm not a writer/ journalist by my profession. I'm not even next to any media profession. I'm working for my mom's company. People screw their graduation years to find themselves settled with a heavy package. Well, here it's a little weird . I was stubborn enough to stick to a decision of studying media. I worked with huge brands, i experienced so much of it. I met people who breathe in the world of pop culture , Public relations, social media, etc. After learning & grasping knowledge, I land up with my mom only because i have residing issues in Mumbai. The whole point is, I breathe and say, " move on! ".


With other things, when there were pains & sorrows, missing out on college and disappointments, the guilt...yet holds itself...!


P.S. Do NOT ask me why did I have SCIENTIFIC Math in Literature. Indian Education System might not have answer to it too! :P